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Phillihp Harmon

Phillihp Harmon

Washington, District of Columbia

Father of two, husband, technology geek, who has a huge interest in projects and the completion of those projects. I have lived in the DC Metro all my life.

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About the author

I have a newborn and a toddler. With the now 1 month old newborn, I have been taking night shift duty to ensure my wife at least gets a little bit of sleep. This comes with many potential surprises, one of which is not knowing what time the newborn will wake up, for whatever reason. But it is getting better as the days go on.

I went on a stretch where I was very much sleep deprived. Mom's for sure know this! Good Dad's know a little. In my sleep deprivation, I secretly wrote poems on our Baby Tracker app on the comments section. Just kind of waiting for my wife to realize what I was doing! She caught on right away!

A lot of these stories got to be pretty hilarious, so I just kept going. I wrote quite a few of them for when my toddler accidentally made mistakes at public events, some about the thoughts that go on in our head while going to the doctors office, looking for missing poops, and even poems about that mysterious diaper machine. Many more!

I love writing and I'd like this book of poops to be a gift to my children as I have received so many gifts from them already. Trust me, we have active counts on our baby tracking app. When they grow up and have children of their own, I'm certain they will understand! And maybe this book will be passed down to them as well.
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$25 1x Original Print

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1 Copy of the original edition book “Gobblygoop Poems of Poop”. 1x Invitation to book launch in Washington DC! First access to all updates on the book and community!

1 copy

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$35 1x Signed Copy

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1 Signed Copy of the original edition book “Gobblygoop Poems of Poop”. 1x Early Event Entry Invitation to book launch in Washington DC! First access to all updates on the book and community!

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$100 Pass 5 Out!

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5x Signed Copies of the original edition book “Gobblygoop Poems of Poop”. 5x Early Event Entry Invitation to book launch in Washington DC! First access to all updates on the book and community!

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$150 Custom Poem

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1x Signed Custom Copy. Write your own poem that you would like professionally printed directly into the first inside page after the cover. Parents and kids all get VIP Invitations to book launch in Washington DC! Poem read at the event. First access to all updates on the book and community! Additional custom prints upon request.

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$500 Custom Book Cover

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3x Signed Custom Copy. Cartoon Artwork of Family Photo or photo of choice. Your photo will be professionally created into a cartoon and professionally printed into the book. Parents and kids all get VIP Invitations to book launch in Washington DC! Cover displayed at the event! First access to all updates on the book and community! Additional custom prints upon request.

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$1000 Complete Custom Package

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5x Signed Custom Copies. Cartoon Artwork of Family Photo or photo of choice. In addition, provide a theme, and the author will write a custom poem for you with one revision. Parents and kids all get VIP Invitations to book launch in Washington DC! Custom Cover displayed while poem is read. First access to all updates on the book and community! Additional custom prints upon request.

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$2000 Be a Sponsor

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50x Resellable Original Prints. Large logo and website URL printed on the inside title page for all original prints. Back cover printed black and white logo with company name at bottom. 1x Sponsor Seat Invitation for one and specific mention at book launch in Washington DC! Sponsor logo and links created on website right rail of website for duration of the print cycle based on this crowd source. Personal contact information and updates from the author! Only 4 available slots.

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Gobbygoop Poems of Poop

With a newborn and toddler, there are lots of night duties, reading kids books, and diaper changes. I wrote 20+ poems about poop, pee, and the parent's dirtiest jobs.

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Children Fiction
500 words
100% complete
4 publishers interested

Synopsis

1) These are simple rhyming poems for children, with professional and stimulating art and graphic work.
2) High Quality, board printed and bound book can handle slobber, pulling, attempted tearing, and well anything else you can imagine.
3) I write the poems from a Dad perspective of changing diapers or running into "diaper" situations.
4) They are real events that happen. From parents worried about no number two's and getting stuck in your head; surprise situations while on around town or on long trips; to simple things like taking out the diaper trash.
5) This book is intended for parents as well as kids! It is fun to read and to be honest, I could see an after dinner party, adults reading the book in a group just laughing at the realism.

Most children's books are very much geared towards learning or growing. This particular children's book is Mom & Dad learning about all the nuances about diaper changes. I hope to find a market in giving this to new parents, who can read to their kids before they are putting sentences together. This book will make parents laugh, some could call it a little edgy, but it is true and remains classy. This book will give plenty for small children children to look at and point to. It allows newborns and toddlers to attach to the rhyming sentence structure. It allows parents to actually read and laugh at the book, without feeling like it is a duty, no pun intended.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRULE0YmD8k

https://www.gobblybook.com/

Sales arguments

  • This is a perfect book to give and read to expecting parents especially as a gift.
  • The dirtiest part of parenting, no pun intended, is the highlight. But these poems are done with class.
  • There is a real rhythm and structure for ages newborn to potty training.
  • By the end, the poems coherse your little listener to fall asleep.
  • Parents will enjoy and laugh at the real situations. No kids required if you all want a laugh around a bottle of wine!

Similar titles

  • Pirates Don't Change Diapers, 2007 - Melinda Long: Story Related, not appealing to newborns and toddlers.
  • 101 Poo Poems by Dr. Deuce, 2018 - Duke Jarboe: Too Dark, Not kid friendly, too long, Too edgy!
  • Everyone Poops, 2001 - Taro Gomi: This book is more or less teaching kids that poop happens.

Audience

This book is written for newborn and toddler parents who experience the late nights, constant diaper changes, and on the road surprises in a fun and friendly manner..

Advance praise

"Ewwww" (laughingly) - My Wife

"The wonders of sleep deprivation! LOL" - Aunt Gabe

"Why are you up at 4 AM changing diapers and writing poems about it?" - Walt

First book print is being delivered as we speak. Looking for more advice and input!

4 publishers interested Express interest
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